Future me

Oh. It’s me again. So, I’ve been pondering a few things as of late. I’ve been having a thought or two, and trying to chew on some super enlightening epiphanies. So here’s what ended up being the burning question: I wonder what my dream world would be like 5 years from now.

Don’t get me wrong! I totally still would be working at the same spot. I love my gig. I’m strictly speaking about goals. Personal goals and shit.

So here’s the deal! In a perfect world where all of my pipe dreams got smoked, here is what my dream life would be like.

writerMy blog dream has pretty much come true. Now, it’s up to me to make this thing bigger and better and then the blog world is my oyster! I love, love, LOVE to write, and blogging is therapy for days. You sure can’t lay on its couch and spew crazy, but it’ll sure make a bitch feel better. I also wouldn’t be mad if some lucrative jack started coming my way. But, since I’m an inconsistently incompetent twit, and probably couldn’t handle the social aspect of having more than 12 followers, I still have some things that I need to iron out in this operation.

My mom had this made for me this Christmas.

My other goal is that I shitnizzle want to finish and publish a book I’ve been working on for a hot minute. (Not the one above) It’s hella funny, I think has great potential, but is not complete. I will finish this venture, and make a million dollar book advance! I’ll actually settle for ten bucks. But, I must get to writing! But, not today, (yawn). I’ll do it tomorrow.

ucfHere’s another far-fetched dream. Finishing school. Jumping into a time machine and unattending the asshat private, non-accredited school that took me for $15K, that was a complete waste of time, so then I could have gone to a real school, finished, and have stopped bitching about it by now.

I just have a prickly sensation in my gloid just thinking about finally….finishing…my….degree….

writerOh yeah, my jewelry biz. My teeny, tiny jewelry shop that just gives me that little bit of extra spending money. I have a little online situation that I need to re-enact, and bam. Big things will start to happen. I also would love to look down from my present self, having knitted some seriously amazing scarves, made some mad jewelry, painted more swell pictures, and concocted a bunch of wood crafts that my husband will certainly resent me for.

Yes, the blog, the book, the knitting, jewelry and SCHOOL. Those are my things. The things that keep me going when I’m knee deep in shitmuck. I can always turn to one of these obsessions and feel the happy sensation. The things that I always have on hand at the drop of an ass tick, that give me happy thoughts and sniggles. Those, and a fat glass of wine.

jewelryFive years into the future, there are also some things that I can’t see undergoing a status change. Although I sooooo could deal with having my scrapbooking up to date, I’m pretty sure that shit will still be unfinished, undone, and untouched from my massive feelings of overwhelm and defeat.

So basically, I guess in the future, I am expecting for some magic. I’m looking for some sudden motivation, focus, time-management, discipline and other shit that I’m completely not capable of doing.

It’s all coming together so clear. I think my simple wish for the future is that I didn’t have ADD. That’s the ticket.

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