Some Thoughts On Hotel Safety

Some Thoughts On Hotel Safety

 Yee Haw Junction, FL
Yee Haw Junction, FL

Never get caught in a hotel bed with a dead girl or a live boy.“… back in the days of Mad Men, this was the extent of hotel safety. Fast-forward a few decades, and my how things have changed.

Unlike Kim Kardashian, I don’t travel with a $10M jewelry stash, nor do I travel with a security force. Possibly Kim needs to look into some of her travel choices.

Safety, whether you’re at home or on the road is a concern, this isn’t Mayberry after all. Number one, you have to be aware of your surroundings, especially when you’re in areas that you’re not familiar with. If the hotel is sketchy, don’t check in! I once bailed on a hotel in Panama City, FL because there were two things missing, police caution tape and a chalk outline of the body that had been in my room, it was that scary.

I have a few safety guidelines when it comes to hotels.

  • I don’t stay in hotels with a number in their name, as silly as it sounds there’s some truth to it.
  • I try to stay on the 3rd floor or higher.
  • I immediately hang the “Do Not Disturb” sign on my door once entering my room as well as LOCKING my door.
  • I don’t stay in “Down And Out” hotels, that’s where all the doors are accessible from an exterior walkway.
  • I make sure the front desk is staffed 24 hours a day, and that the rear and side entrances require a room key for access after dark.
  • Check to verify that doors and windows are locked, especially if you’re staying on the first floor.
  • If you lose your room key, that’s me, make sure they deactivate your old key before issuing you a new one.


Here are a few other things to keep in mind.



Next time you find yourself in a hotel bathroom, look at the air vent (ignore the dust) and more than likely it will be installed upside down. The reason is that years ago, long before webcams & GoPro cameras, someone’s kink was filming hotel patrons in the bathroom, they eventually got caught and now most bathroom vents are installed upside down.





When you get your room keys from the desk clerk immediately remove them from their folder/envelope.  Here’s the reason, the hotel’s name is on it as well your room number. Lose the envelope with your keys still in it and someone knows where you’re staying as well as your room number, and they also  realize that you don’t have your keys.



Door Lock


Plan on running down the hall for more ice, soda or a beer? Make sure to lock your door! Using the door lock bar for holding your door open is a sure sign that you’re an idiot. Take the extra 5 seconds to grab your room key and lock the door correctly.




Do yourself a favor and place a Post-It note or piece of tape over the peephole on the inside your hotel rooms door. If you hadn’t heard about the Erin Andrews lawsuit against the Nashville Marriott then read this.



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